iPhone Cases for Him and Her:

Him and Her:

Anyone who has ever spent any time at all around a member of the opposite sex has probably figured out by now that men and women are very different creatures.

Women are nearly incomprehensible, like a 2 million piece puzzle with pieces that change shape and color when you pick them up. By comparison, men are simple, sort of like a hammer. A soft grip on one end and a hard head on the other.

A quick read of the popular book Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, reveals that men and women are so different from one another that they could easily be from different planets. They look, act, and think differently, it's just the way things are. It's a favorite subject of mine and it never fails to make me laugh when I think about it.

With that in mind I decided to do a humorous comparison of why men and women might decide to put a case or cover on their iPhone.

Just for fun, let's take a look at why guys and girls use iPhone cases.

#1 Fumble Fingers

He's fumbled his phone, or another breakable object on more than one occasion and now sees the need to protect his devices.

His type of case will often be shockproof and or waterproof depending on the circumstances of past fumbles. He may show off the case frequently by dropping it in the pool, or using it to punch a hole in sheetrock.

He secretly believes he will one day fend off a mugger with it, knocking the thief out with a lucky throw to the head as he runs away.

Fumble Fingers carries the case's specs in his pocket or has the website bookmarked for easy reference in the event of a discussion on which case is tougher.

#2 Mr. All Business

He needs a quick way to determine which phone is his when there are two or three laying on the counter.
Chances are he'll grab the wrong one anyway because he got up late, and even if he didn't, he'd be in a hurry.

The cold pizza for breakfast that he was carrying in his mouth probably blocked his view of the phones so he really had a 50/50 chance of grabbing the wrong one.

Basic colors, favorite sports teams, alma matter, or something from an old television series would be the favored case type here.

#3 The Wimp

It was a gift from his wife or girlfriend Stephanie.
In uncomfortably girly lettering it says, "I Heart Stephanie".

It's really too cutesy for him and he's a bit embarrassed for his friends to see it.
Nonetheless, he'll just avoid taking calls rather than remove the case from his phone.

He secretly wants a case that says "I Heart The Cowboys" instead.
What he really needs is to take the Clark Kent outfit off.

The Geek

Everyone in his online guild got the same case.
It reads, "we pwned u" set on a stylized guild logo.
It'll be treasured, possibly even slept with. At least it will until the guild folds due to "political issues".

A skull, flames, and a pirate flag are common as well as anything from Dr. Who, Star Trek, Stargate, Magic the Gathering and Dungeons and Dragons.

#5 The Man

This guy had no intention of ever using a case on his phone until he spotted one by chance that demonstrates just how tough, cool, or intellectual he is.

Once he spotted it, he acquired it immediately and pretended it was what he was after in the first place.

This type of case could be anything from scantily clad women to a 3d representation of Einstein's theory of relativity.

It could also be from a recent movie or television series. It will always be something considered "serious".

Interlude

That's it for the guys, Guys really only need one reason for anything.
Five is overkill, but it would have been a really short lens without the other four.
Now on to the girls.

#1 The Girly Girl

Just like nail polish, it's mostly pretty and adds a bit of protection from chipping and breaking.

This type of case will remind you of an accessory from Legally Blonde, or something you might have seen Paris Hilton carry.

Think pink with sparkles. This sort of phone case often takes the place of a small, annoying dog.

#2 The 90's Girl

When she wakes up out of her drunken stupor to discover that she's not in her own bed, she can easily identify her phone and make a quick getaway.

Having a unique case lessens the chances of grabbing the wrong phone and having to return for hers or canceling that number and getting a new one.

Look for cases that depict themes from charmed, sex and the city, or that feature oriental characters representing the sun, moon, stars, love, or any vague, insubstantial notion or ideal.

#3 The Mood Ring Girl

When you absolutely have to project a certain mood. You know which mood that is.

This girl's cases can be practically anything, but will tend toward dark colors, black or red, usually with highlights of white or silver.

#4 The Girl

She's picked a style and changed it 5 times in the last 5 minutes, just like her dress.

Her type of case could be anything from earthy, to girl-next-door, including sexy, elegant and mysterious. Whatever image she wants to project on her upcoming date.

One thing is for sure, It won't be the same case she used yesterday because she used that other one yesterday and well, this is today Duh!

#5 The Recent Redhead

She just changed the color of her hair and now needs a case to go with her new look and personality.

Watch out, anything goes here, the only certainty is that it won't be like the "old" case, and because of that, it's better of course. Don't you think?

Note: This is interchangeable with "The Recent Blonde" and the "Brunette Again" styles.

#6 The Tech Girl

Apple is coming out with a new iPhone next month and she's got to sell her old one on eBay.

It's important that there be no marks or scratches on the case so it gets the best resale value.
This type of case will be soft, gel-filled and durable at the same time.

Her case may often depict a ponytailed schoolgirl pwning guy number 4 from the guys list above, usually in Call of Duty or Battlefield 3.

#7 The Glitter Girl

The iPhone was not designed with women in mind, it has too much function and not enough glitter.

The glitter girl makes up for this with sparkly, shiny, attraction getting cases. A glowing neon case is perfect for this girl.

#8 Accessory Girl

It's widely considered that the iPhone is an accessory, so accessorize, accessorize, accessorize.

A phone case for every outfit, or at the very least a matching case for every purse. Isn't it obvious?

#9 The Shoe Girl

Similar in nature to the Accessory girl, but more focused on shoes.

The shoe girl will have a case to match each pair of shoes and even a case with shoes on it!

Designer names in flashy, sparkly letters may also grace her phone case.

#10 Ms. Practical

The iPhone can easily slide around the dashboard or console, especially when you're distracted putting on lipstick or eye shadow.

Ms. Practical's attractive yet functional case prevents her phone from sliding around while taking sharp corners at high speeds and weaving in and out of heavy traffic.

Her phone is usually not in her purse because she had to remove it to dig for makeup.

Thats It

Well, I couldn't help but giggle the whole time I wrote that. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did, or at the very least got a few chuckles.